Need advice and input

[asianjkim]

I've been thinking about this for a couple months now. I do enjoy living here in Colorado but it's not what I really imagined. I thought making friends would be easy but turned out the opposite. I've been here almost a year now and I feel depressed. I have met a couple people outside this forum and whatnot but just isn't the same. I want to be with my friends and enjoy my life but since I am here its been nothing but prison. I can go out but I don't know anyone to go hang out with. What do you guys think? Am I just being a idiot and need to suck it up? I do really want to move back, I feel that my life was awesome even though I was like almost 300lbs. I was fat and happy there and now I am skinnier and miserable. The tension with my step-mom and me is like "hi mom" and she just completely and utterly ignores me. So I feel like I need to get out.

[DrJones]

I've been thinking about this for a couple months now. I do enjoy living here in Colorado but it's not what I really imagined. I thought making friends would be easy but turned out the opposite. I've been here almost a year now and I feel depressed. I have met a couple people outside this forum and whatnot but just isn't the same. I want to be with my friends and enjoy my life but since I am here its been nothing but prison. I can go out but I don't know anyone to go hang out with. What do you guys think? Am I just being a idiot and need to suck it up? I do really want to move back, I feel that my life was awesome even though I was like almost 300lbs. I was fat and happy there and now I am skinnier and miserable. The tension with my step-mom and me is like "hi mom" and she just completely and utterly ignores me. So I feel like I need to get out.

Colorado is a great place to live (in general). Most people love it here, and a lot of the studies that come out rank it as a great place to live.

Of course, your millage may vary.

If I were in your position, I would make a list of what I don't like about here (as you kind of have) and then look at how you can fix those.

Everyone faces the problem of finding new friends when they move to a new area. There are some cases where it's easier, because the situation kind of sets itself up to do so naturally (like living in a dorm in college). But more often than not, it's something you have to work towards.

It may take some work, but there are plenty of ways to meet people who share your interests.

Just look at the kind of things you like to do, then do them. You'll likely meet people you enjoy hanging out with. If you like do dance and go to clubs, do that. If there is a sport you like to play (or want to) then look for a local league. There are always all kinds of them going on (everything from Ultimate Frisbee to Hockey). A lot of people also make friends through work/school, since they are people you will see often. Also, of course, there is also getting to know people who your friends that you do have here already know. Chances are, if you like your friends, you'll like them as well.

The step mom thing can be a little more dependent on the situation, but I'm sure it can be better than it currently is.

[Evil_SpeedRacer]

I say hang in there buddy, you have a whole summer to make friends! There are all kinds of car events going on, HAI and elsewhere. Like the Doc says, if you can find people who are like minded, then you will find your niche. I know that you are into cars, and that the car events have been slim to none since it has been winter and all, thus it is not unreasonable to believe that you will have a hell of a lot more opportunity to find a circle of people to fit into. The next step after that is find someone within your new niche that needs a place or a room-mate, and get out of the bad step mom situation. Not only is that bringing you down with the living arrangements, but the negativity from it is drowning everything else in your life. That in turn makes it easier to point out all the other things negative here, and will make everything before Colorado way cooler than what you have experienced here. All because of one person. Don't let her chase you out of the state before you really get a handle on what things are about here. This place is awesome, there is plenty of crap to do, plenty of people to meet, and the chicks probably look better here too...:D I'm half kidding on that last one....

[jackmode9316]

"One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives."

“I would like to make a toast to lying, stealing, cheating and drinking. If you're going to lie, lie for a friend. If you're going to steal, steal a heart. If your going to cheat, cheat death. And if you're going to drink, drink with me.”

I say suck it up and try to make things work. Then again, im not really to great at making new friends. I tend to be a bit reclusive actually. Why do you feel depressed? Is it loneliness or something? I used to get that feeling even though I have a handful of close friends down here. Is it possibly something else that is causing these feelings? Hope things chip up for you holmes.

+1 to what Shawn said about the stepmom situation. That negativity needs to be elsewhere.

[Terry]

Colorado isn't fun until you turn 21

[nicklk]

I will COMPLETELY agree with you that it is impossible to find good friends in Colorado, I moved here from Oregon about 2.5 years ago and was competely depressed to the point I was going to say fuck it and move back to Oregon (even though ALL my family lives here)

People are completely different here in Denver then anywhere else I've been to. I found that alot of the people here are closed to their own little groups and not willing to have any additional people come into their group. In Oregon it was complete opposite, you could meet someone at a bar or out and about and be good friends with them and trust them a week later.

That being said, keep your head up and keep it in the game. Contine being pro-active as far as getting out and meeting people, you will make a turn. I did.

[Kwando]

Hang in there jason! if you want to hang out you know my number.


don't let it get to you, look at it as a challenge. Hell if you can loose 100+ lbs, you can find new friends.

[-=[Juztin]=-]

I concur to what Simon posted, I fly out for work a bit, but when I'm back in town and you wanna cruise or some shiz, hit me up 303.520.9643

Justin

Too bad you didn't come by a few years ago back when a lot of us on HAI used to hang out/party all the time, I'm sure you would of been party of the clique so-to-speak. Since then we've all gotten old we tend to stick to the tried and true friends. But I have no probs brining a new bro into the crew. Only thing is I'm down south (along with a lot of us), like I-25 & Arapahoe south but your always more than welcome to come hang with me/simon/chris/ben/steve/etc when we go out, hell post your # or PM me it and we'll call ya when we go out...

B.t.w., if you like to game catch me on xbox live if you got it (Leaky Buffer)

Speaking of which I need to post another HAI cruise soon now that the weather is finally getting good.

[Kwando]

justin you should host a HAI pool/hot tub meet again...

[asianjkim]

Thanks guys for your input and thoughts. Meeting people here is not hard but its more of one-time hang out and thats it. Most people are in their own little crew's which they dont like new people unless you fit into their "crew." I do really think if i did move out my life would be alot more fun and i wouldnt have my parents or anything draggin me down. but if i bring it up to them they start bitching and try to bribe me to stay. which i dont mind paying for rent and whatnot but it is alot nicer when i dont have to worry about that. I think this summer im just not going to work at all. Gonna get done with school and once may comes im going to go out and meet people.

At school i try "hey whats up?" and they just ignore me or they just make it small talk. Honestly I am a very cool and laid back person. None the less a people person. So I am finding it so hard to believe that I am having problems making friends or meeting people. I hang out with my church college group but that's only sundays.

So in a nutshell im going to take off work for this summer and just go out and have fun. I saved up some extra cash so it wont be a problem but I can't go crazy. :rofl: I do like to drink but I tend not to drink so its hard to find friends that dont drink. Last time I went to the HAI meet I met 3 people right off the bat when I came here but I lost their numbers so I haven't been able to contact them. I do like hanging out with people older than me because I dont want to be around 19-20 year old drama. But I guess we'll see what happens.

[asianjkim]

Colorado isn't fun until you turn 21
I wouldn't say that, but it does make it a hundred times better.

[asianjkim]

Hang in there jason! if you want to hang out you know my number.


don't let it get to you, look at it as a challenge. Hell if you can loose 100+ lbs, you can find new friends.
Yeah, thats my second problem. I'm so afraid of gaining my weight back since I've had best friends lose close or if not the same amount of weight and for some reason they gained it back for various reasons. So I spend my extra time exercising. Can you blame me? I think maybe I need to tone everything down a bit and just give myself some "me" time. I gave my work my two-weeks notice so I'll give you a text to go get some pho.

[Dave_L]

=-;842667']
Too bad you didn't come by a few years ago back when a lot of us on HAI used to hang out/party all the time, I'm sure you would of been party of the clique so-to-speak. Since then we've all gotten old we tend to stick to the tried and true friends. But I have no probs brining a new bro into the crew. Only thing is I'm down south (along with a lot of us), like I-25 & Arapahoe south but your always more than welcome to come hang with me/simon/chris/ben/steve/etc when we go out, hell post your # or PM me it and we'll call ya when we go out...



:werd: That shiznit was fun! :drink:

[Kwando]

Yeah, thats my second problem. I'm so afraid of gaining my weight back since I've had best friends lose close or if not the same amount of weight and for some reason they gained it back for various reasons. So I spend my extra time exercising. Can you blame me? I think maybe I need to tone everything down a bit and just give myself some "me" time. I gave my work my two-weeks notice so I'll give you a text to go get some pho.

pho king sweet!

[Brandon]

:werd: That shiznit was fun! :drink:


Word!

Now that I"m common law married, I'm pretty lame. The most partying I do these days is "game night" with our other couples friends. Of course I'm blaming a lot of that on school + work = no time for fun.

[asianjkim]

We should start making HAI meets every weekend. I think it will bring back some good ol' times and bring out new ones as well. A month left of school and summer here I come!

[asianjkim]

=-;842667']I concur to what Simon posted, I fly out for work a bit, but when I'm back in town and you wanna cruise or some shiz, hit me up 303.520.9643

Justin

Too bad you didn't come by a few years ago back when a lot of us on HAI used to hang out/party all the time, I'm sure you would of been party of the clique so-to-speak. Since then we've all gotten old we tend to stick to the tried and true friends. But I have no probs brining a new bro into the crew. Only thing is I'm down south (along with a lot of us), like I-25 & Arapahoe south but your always more than welcome to come hang with me/simon/chris/ben/steve/etc when we go out, hell post your # or PM me it and we'll call ya when we go out...

B.t.w., if you like to game catch me on xbox live if you got it (Leaky Buffer)

Speaking of which I need to post another HAI cruise soon now that the weather is finally getting good.
Yeah, that would be awesome. 303-898-0408.

[Kwando]

congrats on 1500 posts!

[asianjkim]

congrats on 1500 posts!
:rofl: I just now noticed that.

[MrsGhandi]

Well, if you like Pho, firearms and target practice, stick w/ Kwando (Simon).

By the way Simon....isn't it about time we set up a shooting meet? Those are always so fun when it's not 2 degrees outside. I got to get this kid used to some noise ;)

[dreadlocks]

Ive been in Denver for like a year and a half.. Most of the people I know or hang out with I have meet in my apartment complex, at work or at a car show. It can be tricky but I was lucky enough that I knew 3-4 people in denver before I moved up here and they showed me around town and introduce me to some people.

That being said, I love this town and hate where I was raised.. The people here are much more relaxed and open minded than where I come from.. The weed is top shelf and its not a sausage fest were the guys outnumber the girls 3:1, not mentioning the women here are are a multitude better looking than where I come from.

Oh ya, I see exotic cars out in public on a regular basis instead of in magazines.. The concerts & events going on here already have my calender booked for a good portion of the summer weekends and did I mention the chicks here are HAWT!

No reason to go back to bumfuck whever you came from.. All your friends are stuck doing the same old shit and nothing has changed back home.. Your better off here, you just don't realize it yet.

[sirtef9]

If your ever in the Springs and wanna turn some wrenches, have a beer or just chill, I'm always here:-)

[Kwando]

Well, if you like Pho, firearms and target practice, stick w/ Kwando (Simon).

By the way Simon....isn't it about time we set up a shooting meet? Those are always so fun when it's not 2 degrees outside. I got to get this kid used to some noise ;)

Pho king white!! There are just so many things going on each weekend its hard to find one that accommodates everyone.

Last shooting meet we had was down south by woodland park and that was a little far for plinking. Anyone up for a north shoot in may?

[asianjkim]

Ive been in Denver for like a year and a half.. Most of the people I know or hang out with I have meet in my apartment complex, at work or at a car show. It can be tricky but I was lucky enough that I knew 3-4 people in denver before I moved up here and they showed me around town and introduce me to some people.

That being said, I love this town and hate where I was raised.. The people here are much more relaxed and open minded than where I come from.. The weed is top shelf and its not a sausage fest were the guys outnumber the girls 3:1, not mentioning the women here are are a multitude better looking than where I come from.

Oh ya, I see exotic cars out in public on a regular basis instead of in magazines.. The concerts & events going on here already have my calender booked for a good portion of the summer weekends and did I mention the chicks here are HAWT!

No reason to go back to bumfuck whever you came from.. All your friends are stuck doing the same old shit and nothing has changed back home.. Your better off here, you just don't realize it yet.
That's true. If I went back to Iowa. I would probably gain my weight back. That's what happened to my brother. :rofl:
If your ever in the Springs and wanna turn some wrenches, have a beer or just chill, I'm always here:-)
Yeah, next time im in the springs ill let you know. My g-ma lives there and I usually visit her once a month.

[jackmode9316]

Ive been in Denver for like a year and a half.. Most of the people I know or hang out with I have meet in my apartment complex, at work or at a car show. It can be tricky but I was lucky enough that I knew 3-4 people in denver before I moved up here and they showed me around town and introduce me to some people.

That being said, I love this town and hate where I was raised.. The people here are much more relaxed and open minded than where I come from.. The weed is top shelf and its not a sausage fest were the guys outnumber the girls 3:1, not mentioning the women here are are a multitude better looking than where I come from.

Oh ya, I see exotic cars out in public on a regular basis instead of in magazines.. The concerts & events going on here already have my calender booked for a good portion of the summer weekends and did I mention the chicks here are HAWT!

No reason to go back to bumfuck whever you came from.. All your friends are stuck doing the same old shit and nothing has changed back home.. Your better off here, you just don't realize it yet.
Damn that sounds alot like where I came from. How very interesting. I am DAMN SURE that I am never moving back their. No way, no how.

[stu]

Aren't you old enough to just move out?

Yes please on the shooting meet.

[asianjkim]

Aren't you old enough to just move out?




Oh yeah, I just need to find a job that will be able to support me. I don't know anyone so I can't room with anyone.

[Kwando]

send me your resume jason.

[asianjkim]

send me your resume jason.
Oh god. I don't even think I have mine anymore. I'll make a new one and send it to you asap.

[sirtef9]

That's true. If I went back to Iowa. I would probably gain my weight back. That's what happened to my brother. :rofl:

Yeah, next time im in the springs ill let you know. My g-ma lives there and I usually visit her once a month.
Good deal , pm me next time you head down!