exciv2000
06-16-2005, 06:05 PM
A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced ten husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle; I'm still a virgin."
"What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
"Well, husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be."
"Husband #2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me."
"Husband #3 was from Field Services; he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up."
"Husband #4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver."
"Husband #5 was an Engineer; he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.. "
"Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not"
"Husband #7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it."
"Husband #8 was a psychiatrist; all he ever did was talk about it."
"Husband #9 was a gynecologist; all he did was look."
"Husband #10 was a stamp collector; all he ever did was.....God, I miss him!"
"But now that I've married you, I'm so excited!"
"Good," said the husband, "but, why?"
"You're with the Government. This time I KNOW I'm gonna get SCREWED!"
"What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
"Well, husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be."
"Husband #2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me."
"Husband #3 was from Field Services; he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up."
"Husband #4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver."
"Husband #5 was an Engineer; he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.. "
"Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not"
"Husband #7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it."
"Husband #8 was a psychiatrist; all he ever did was talk about it."
"Husband #9 was a gynecologist; all he did was look."
"Husband #10 was a stamp collector; all he ever did was.....God, I miss him!"
"But now that I've married you, I'm so excited!"
"Good," said the husband, "but, why?"
"You're with the Government. This time I KNOW I'm gonna get SCREWED!"